balloons-388973_1920Birthdays are always a time to celebrate. After all, it’s another year of your being alive; another year of not killing anyone while sitting in traffic or standing in ridiculously long lines at the newest bakery. On one hand, you have another year to look forward to; but, on the other, it is tempting to look at it as another year gone. It’s easy to find yourself sitting on your bed or couch thinking, “what have I done this year?” You may also find it odd, when people want to celebrate you.

I love celebrating my birthday with friends; but, I must admit, I suffer from birthday anxiety. I feel guilty for people spending money on me, taking time out of their lives for me and doing what I want to do. It’s too much attention on me and that makes me nervous. For example, at a previous job, my coworkers had a surprise birthday celebration for me. I walked in with a look of shock. Nick thought I was mad; really, I was just embarrassed that people would want to celebrate me.

One of my favorite television scenes in regards to birthdays was on “Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt.” The main character, Kimmy was having her first adult birthday party (she was kidnapped at 15 and was found 15 years later) at the age of 30. She had so many hopes for her birthday because she had a new job, a new rich boyfriend and new friends. Needless to say, she had herself a good old fashion adult birthday cry at the end. Her boyfriend and classmate get into a fight, her roommate invites a random guy over because he is cute, no one helps her set up and her family shows up unannounced. It works out in the end though; because, after her cry, she finds joy in her new friendships and meeting her sister.

I have learned over the years to not expect a lot at a birthday party and be grateful for the people who are there. So, here is to another 31 years of life.

Hugs and Smiles