We have all encountered them. We have felt their hate and been the victim of their lies and rumors. Yup, that’s right, I am talking about the workplace bully. I have met so many bullies in the office lunchroom; and, more often than not, they have been in management. A workplace bully makes any company uncomfortable.
How do we deal with these bullies? There is not a lot of legal action that one can take against someone who rolls their eyes, excludes you and makes you cry.
But, when I was reading up on the workplace bully, I thought to myself, can a bully produce another bully? I have had managers that created such a toxic place that in order to protect myself, I, in turn, became negative.
I have rolled my eyes at my boss, made a boss cry and excluded people from meetings. Yet, in my defense, I rolled my eyes, because my boss was talking gibberish and showed us no respect. I have made my boss cry, because I was fed up to the point where I couldn’t think of them as a human being anymore. I excluded toxic unproductive people from meetings so that work could get done.
Does this make me a bully? Well, no, but it does make me childish. Yes, I can call myself childish, it’s my magazine. I should have thought of a more productive solution. However, it’s hard to be the “better person” when the person making more money than you is the bully. Here are some things I have learned when dealing with bullies:
- Don’t become their friend: No after work drinks. They will just talk about people you work with and that negative energy will transfer into your personal life.
- Write down everything they do: You will need it if you talk to HR.
- Go above them: Sometimes you have to have a meeting with their manager. I did this once and I learned that the company was keeping the manager to save money. Big sign for me to leave.
- Leave: If the company keeps hiring toxic people, they have a big problem. Too big for you to waste your energy to solve. If you can, leave.
Finally, remember that a bully, whether in the workplace or on the playground, is just communicating out of insecurities. It is not that they are mad at you, they are mad at themselves.
Hugs and Smiles,